Poking Fun at Self-Isolation Quarantine

Day 1 – I can do this!! Got enough food and wine to last a month!
Day 2 – Opening my eighth bottle of wine. I fear wine supplies might not last!
Day 3 – Strawberries: Some have 210 seeds, some have 235 seeds. Who knew?
Day 4 – 8 p.m. Removed day pajamas and put on night pajamas.
Day 5 – Today, tried to make hand sanitizer. It came out as Jello shots!
Day 6 – I get to take the garbage out. I’m so excited; I can’t decide what to wear.
Day 7 – Laughing way too much at my own jokes!
Day 8 – Went to a new restaurant called “The Kitchen.” You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have no clue how this place is still in business.
Day 9 – I put liquor bottles in every room. Tonight, I’m getting all dressed up and going bar hopping.
Day 10 – Struck up a conversation with a spider today. Seems nice. He’s a web designer.
Day 11 – Isolation is hard. I swear my fridge just said, “What the heck do you want now?”
Day 12 – I realized why dogs get so excited about something moving outside, going for walks or car rides. I think I just barked at a squirrel.
Day 13 – If you keep a glass of wine in each hand, you can’t accidently touch your face.
Day 14 – Watched the birds fight over a worm. The Cardinals lead the Blue Jays 3–1.
Day 15 – Anybody else feel like they’ve cooked dinner about 395 times this month?

Submitted by Liz NELSON from an out-of-state newspaper,
source unknown