Being Invisible

I had a lot of fun during my “down time” last week. My friend Terri and I attended a candle-making class at Banter and Bliss in Pasadena. While we were waiting for our candles to set, we had dinner at Mi Piace, a delicious Italian restaurant on Colorado Boulevard.

I’ve known Terri since 1976 – a couple of years to be sure – and we’ve experienced a lot over the decades: marriages, divorces, children, aging parents and death, among others.

I had always felt like an amazon standing next to Terri. I’m 5’6” while she is more of a petite 5’2”. Growing up she was truly an Italian beauty – dark hair, dark eyes and a fantastic figure. I remember going to a restaurant for breakfast one day and a guy walked by and actually dropped a note into her lap telling her how beautiful she was and asking if he could call her.

Yeah – nothing like that ever happened to me.

Over the years we have grown up … and out. She and I are both heavier (i.e. fatter) than we used to be and our hair (beneath the color) is a little bit grayer.

When we were talking on Saturday night I shared that I just don’t feel my age (which used to sound oh-so-very-old but now – not so much). She agreed for the most part and said that a friend of hers asked her when they became “invisible.”

I understand. I’m sure that Terri no longer has anyone dropping notes in her lap. Despite aging like a fine wine, older women are treated more like old cheese. There are books on the subject that delve into this world “that is designed by men.”

But the long and short of it is that many women are more aware of the passage of time – spending time examining new wrinkles and crow’s feet and searching for (and usually finding) the dreaded cellulite.

It seems wiser to me to quit looking – take off your glasses and give it a rest. After all, good work is going to last longer than good looks. That’s what I’m banking on.

However, it is the new year and like millions on this planet it’s a time for resolutions. As CV Weekly kicks off our annual healthful living month, sharing information regarding the challenges and successes in today’s world of health, I resolve to drop those 20 pounds that have attached themselves to me. I know it’s nice to have more of me to love – but there is a point when I can go too far.