Harmonious or chaotic? Is your household always harmonious or mostly chaotic? Do you remember when you first fell in love? Do you remember when you had butterflies, constant happiness and yearning to be with the other person? Everyone should feel these thoughts with everyone they are close to forever and always. It should be that way for you, your wife, your kids, your parents, your cousins… everyone, especially those you like and live with.

On Tuesday we met for our parent sessions at Crescenta Valley High School’s library and learned that to have a harmonious life it is easily accomplished with the 7 “B’s”.

B #1 is to ‘Be Nice’: Be nice to those who you live and spend time with on a regular basis.  Make them smile. Leave a quick note on the mirror. Buy a special treat for them. “The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman will help you figure out what nice things will be more receptive to those you care about.

B #2 is to ‘Be Thankful’: Thank the ones you love. Just don’t say thank you…really thank them. Look for every opportunity to thank them for every little thing that made you happy or made you smile. Let them know you appreciate them.

B #3 is ‘Be Playful’: Have fun with them. Make time for them. Clear your calendar and put your phone away and do exactly what they want for just one day.

Take interest in something they do or plan a fun outing together. Even be like a child and do something silly

B #4 is ‘Be Independent’:Find a little time for you. You should always make time for yourself as well as time together. The key is finding the right balance. Have a hobby that is just yours. Buy yourself some flowers. You set the standard for how you want to be treated by how you treat yourself… so do it right.

B #5 is ‘Be Honest’: Make a pact to always be honest, to always listen to one another and accept each other.

B #6 is ‘Be Positive’: Make the mutual choice to maintain a positive attitude. Being positive may be the key to keeping harmony. You can control your behaviors and even your moods when necessary. Take a deep breath, focusing on the exhale, and ask yourself, “What can I say or do right now to feel good”

B #7 is ‘Be Grateful’: Be happy for what you have. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.  Start a gratitude journal and write down five good things that happened to you every day.  Focus on what you love. If you focus on love, you will get more love.

The real key is to realize the people that are closest to you need your love and support the most. So be nice, be thankful, be playful, be independent, be happy, be honest and be grateful and if you do, your home should always BE harmonious.

By Julia Rabago, Program Director CV Alliance