By Mary O’KEEFE

I spend part of each day checking Instagram. I do this to get quick information on what is going on in the world of social media. Now there is a lot of empty information there but there are times that something makes me pause. One of those times happened recently.

There was a post in which an elderly woman asked a male neighbor to turn off his rope lights. She said it was keeping her awake; he first reminded her that they had gone through this before and the lights were not directed at her home and that when the police were called they too said the lights did not affect her. But she said they did. And then something amazing happened. This man, who was Black and much younger than this White elderly woman, said he would turn off the lights at 10 p.m. The woman’s attitude immediately changed.

“Is that okay?” she asked.

Then she repeatedly said she was sorry, and the man said he thought he knew what was going on – she needed to come over to his house when she was lonely. They would have something to eat and they would talk. He even invited her and her son to come over and sit on the front porch if he wasn’t home. He said he loved her.

I have spoken before about the affect of these small acts of kindness and how overwhelming they are in people’s lives. We may remember when someone was threatening or mean, but acts of kindness shape our lives and make a forever change in us. It just takes someone to step up and change the narrative from combative to kind.

As is my nature, I went beyond this simple act and started thinking about how kindness can also get a response from animals and the environment. And that brought me to sea lions and Monterey … naturally.

I spent a lot of time in Monterey when my kids were young. Every night when I finished work my son and I would go to the pier and look out over the ocean, and almost every single night we would see at least one injured sea lion. Most of the time their injury was caused by fisherman’s netting. There were a lot of large fishing ships off the coast at the time and they used plastic nets to capture fish; however, often sea lions, sharks and dolphins were the unintended prey.

I found the phone number to report injured sea lions (yes there was a number specifically for them because they were injured so often). We would call them so often the responders and I knew each other by our first names. The statistics on how many sea lions are injured or killed by nets in California do not seem to be accurate. It is a self-reporting program by fisherman, and therein, I think, lies the problem.

“While information is scarce for many years and species, there is sufficient data between 2005 and 2012 for California sea lions and harbor seals to draw significant conclusions. In those eight years fishery participants self-reported 100 incidents of set gillnets catching and either injuring or killing a California sea lion or harbor seal, an average of approximately 12 each year. In contrast, National Marine Fisheries Service estimates that over the same period there were actually 1,698 sea lions or harbor seals – approximately 212 per year – caught and harmed by California set gillnets, based on fishery data acquired on trips where an observer was on board,” according to usa.oceania.org.

Just from what my son and I witnessed I would tend to believe there were even more than 212 per year.

San Diego City Council voted to close a stretch of Point La Jolla in 2023 because so many people were taking selfies with the sea lions that came ashore to give birth, nurse and breed. Not only would these “visitors” take selfies with these creatures but they would also fly drones close to their faces, throw sand and kick them.

So a stretch of beach was closed – not due to rogue waves or dangerous toxic water levels but because of mean people. You can’t even excuse these people as being ignorant or uneducated about sea lions. When you throw something at a creature you pretty much know it could hurt that creature. It is because the people were mean.

In the case in San Diego, as well as what my son and I witnessed, these “mean people” were usually in a group. It was not one person who went after a sea lion but many and they seemed to feed off each other. Can anyone say, “The Monsters Are Due on Maple Street”? This Twilight Zone episode is the quintessential example of what happens when a mob turns mean.

According to an article titled, “The Psychology of Mob Mentality” in Psychology Today, social psychology gives these causes of mob mentality: “Deindividuation – When people are part of a group, they experience a loss of self-awareness. Identity – When people are part of a group, they can lose their sense of individual identity. Emotions – Being part of a group can lead to heightened emotional states, be that excitement, anger, hostility, etc. Acceptability – Behaviors that are usually seen as unacceptable become acceptable when others in a group are seen carrying them out. Anonymity – people feel anonymous within a large group, which reduces their sense of responsibility and accountability. Diffusion of responsibility – Being part of a group creates the perception that violent or unacceptable behavior is not a personal responsibility but a group one. The larger the group or crowd, the more likely there will be deindividuation and diffusion of responsibility.”

So when one person throws something at a sea lion or dodges them with a drone, the others who are watching feel empowered by this action. They feel superior, and that can even be the feeling that occurs when a group of fishermen sees that plastic netting around a sea lion. They may not see it as cruel but as through the lens of a superior being.

But here’s the thing: it takes great strength of character to put the brakes on cruelty or meanness if you are in the middle of these groups.

My son and I saw that power of kindness when we were watching as the mean people were taunting the sea lions. There were others on the Monterey beach who were closer to the sea lions. They were keeping people away from the injured creatures as they awaited the animal responders. These people were so kind. They didn’t yell at those who wanted to get closer; they just explained that it could be dangerous for them and for the sea lion. These strange people who thought it was their right to exploit this injured sea lion started out very aggressive but then, because the sea lion protectors were so quiet, calm and kind, they became quiet. And all of a sudden they too were concerned for the sea lions. It didn’t happen with everyone but it happened enough to see the difference. In fact, when we would see some of these formerly aggressive people on the pier later they talked about their role in saving the sea lions.

Come to find out, according to Cedars-Sinai, acts of kindness release hormones that contribute to a person’s mood and overall sense of wellbeing. The practice is so effective it’s being formally incorporated into some types of psychotherapy.

“We all seek a path to happiness,” said Dr. Waguih William IsHak, a professor of psychiatry at Cedars-Sinai. “Practicing kindness toward others is one we know works.”

“Most research on the science behind why kindness makes us feel better has centered around oxytocin. Sometimes called ‘the love hormone,’ oxytocin plays a role in forming social bonds and trusting other people. It’s the hormone mothers produce when they breastfeed, cementing their bond with their babies. Studies have also linked random acts of kindness to releasing dopamine, a chemical messenger in the brain that can give us a feeling of euphoria. This feel-good brain chemical is credited with causing what’s known as a ‘helper’s high,’ according to Cedars Sinai.

In addition to boosting oxytocin and dopamine, being kind can also increase serotonin, a neurotransmitter that helps regulate mood.

Last week was Kindness Week in GUSD schools. My first thought was, “Isn’t it too bad we have to bring attention to being kind, something we should practice every day?” But after seeing the Instagram post and thinking about those animal protectors of my past, I realized that being reminded to be kind is something we all could use every now and then.

So we need to be kind to each other, taking the road that as of late has been less traveled; however, we also need to be kind to the environment. We should use our kindness to help prevent damage. Maybe we should think on how we can be kind to the animals and plants around us – how we can change the dialogue from being complacent about climate change to being kind to the Earth by truly caring about the planet.

I don’t think society will ever reach the utopian era that science fiction writers tell us about; there is always a price to pay for perfection. However, I do think that if we tried using more kindness rather than aggression we could find a path that all could walk on together.

Temperatures will slowly begin to rise and by Saturday and Sunday we should be seeing temperatures in the high 70s and possible low 80s.This is about 10 degrees above normal, according to Mike Wofford, NOAA meteorologist.

We can’t get too comfortable with the warm weather because after Tuesday cooler temps will begin as another storm moves toward the Crescenta Valley. It is expected to bring rain and winds to our area by Thursday.